My mother

The other day, I sent my mother a message on Facebook. I said, “what would you have named me if I had been born a girl?” She replied back “Kristine” which is what I plan to change my name to, so I asked her about middle name, expecting some “J” name, but instead it was “Rose” which is her middle name, as well as her mother’s. I found that middle name odd, because all of us kids have names that start with “K” and middle names that start with “J”, except my youngest brother who has a different father, his middle name is his father’s, which starts with “E”.

Anyway, she didn’t reply until today, and I was at work, so I really didn’t want to come out to her via Facebook message and/or while at work. So I asked her if her phone was working again and asked her to make sure I had her phone number, and then as I was getting ready to drive home I called her and came out.

I was a lot calmer than when I came out to my Dad and stepmother, and I’m not sure why. I had no script to go by like I did with them, I just, said it. And it felt great. But what felt even better was her response. “I don’t care if you’re my son or daughter, as long as you’re happy.” That specific phrasing? That, I think, was the best thing I could have heard.

She did say that her first guess as to the “why” for the question about my name, was that I’m transgender. So there’s that. I just feel REALLY good about how it went. I talked with her for half the drive home, until I approached an area where cell reception cuts out, so we said goodbye before the call dropped.

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